SPORT IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE

So much to blog about this week but I'm going to give you an insight into the commitment required to live in a rural area when you have kids and want them to play sport.

So, we live in an absolutely amazing rural area full of fabulous people with a great sense of community.  The families around here are also what would be termed "good breeders" with most families having an heir and a spare and then some.  We ourselves have four kids, all of whom are playing a sport this winter.

When you live in town, sport is usually a much more simple affair involving a five to ten minute drive across town to get your kids to sport.  Often schools in town have much higher rolls so there are plenty of parents to take on the tasks of coaches and administrators.  It is quite a different scenario when you live in the country!!  Our school has a roll of about 54.  Being that we are all "breeders" the actual number of families is something like 20.  This of course means that when its time for sport, there aren't many hands to go around so nearly everyone has to take on one (or several) roles.  I am co-coaching one of the netball teams which means a once a week practice, and helping out with another team when the coach is unavailable, as well as being on the Committee.  Fortunately this year our three daughters all have practice on the same day however last year it was quite different with me having to do a one hour round trip twice a week for practices and a three hour round trip for games on Saturdays.

There is also the issue of not having enough children to make up full teams, a problem in most rural areas.  The usual way of things is that schools that are nearby will band together to find enough kids to make up full teams.  The concept of "nearby" though is an interesting one and comes with its own set of problems.  What constitutes nearby?  Well its all relative isn't it.  If you live on the North Shore, a nearby school would be about 2-3km away from another one.  In rural areas, nearby takes on a whole new meaning.  Our "nearby" schools are all 20-30km away from each other making the logistics of sports practice a little difficult.  In order to facilitate kids being able to play sport and get home before it is completely dark, our entire school day changes for the winter term with a shortened lunch hour and school finishing at 2.30pm.  My kids though live 30 minutes from school so unfortunately they still get home in the dark after sports practice!!  Kids are required to be extremely adaptable and the kiwi attitude of "just get on with it" seems to start a little bit earlier in country kids.  This is evident in Xanthe, our youngest, who in order to play netball has had to join a team of kids from town where she is the only country kid and knew nobody in her team.  It didn't phase her one bit though...character building is what they call it isn't it?

Madeleine, our oldest, is in a combined team with another nearby school this year, but last year she was in a combined team with two different schools whose distance from our home is over 100km one way.  She has to travel most weeks from our school to Weber school for practice.  Unfortunately this is also the day that I coach Lizzie's team at Pongaroa School so of course I cannot transport her there.  Cue rural community spirit and car pooling.  One parent, who also happens to be the coach of that team, drives Madeleine and the other A Grade players to their practices and another parent brings them back.  In the meantime two of us are coaching the C Grade team at Pongaroa School.  It is much easier than last year when she was travelling into Dannevirke once a week, although the local Pub provided the Community Van to transport them.  Hilarious watching the pub branded courtesy van full of young kids!!

Saturdays are an absolute nightmare in our house.  It is a nearly three hour round trip for netball and rugby games in Dannevirke.  We have to leave our house at 7.30 every Saturday morning in order to get to the Courts by 9.00am, stopping on the way to pick up the team sweets and player of the day prize.  It is even more difficult if Scott is planning on playing rugby for our local club that day.  We all need to go into town and I have to have lunch made for all six of us (I'm refuse to buy lunch as its too expensive) and I also have to have a substantial meal item made to take to the club rooms for after Scott's game.   The kids all play their respective games, with me coaching and assisting where needed....running around like a chook with my head cut off.  We then load into the car, stuff our faces with bacon and egg pie or sandwiches, while we drive the one hour back to Pongaroa for Scott's rugby.

I often say "oh well, it could be worse" and, quite often, it is.  On cold wet days you have to take at least one change of clothes per family member, sometimes two.  If Scott is unavailable then I have all four kids to deal with and often he will ask me to do a couple of jobs for him, seeing as I'm going to be in town.  I am often envious of some of the other parents who wander up to Netball immaculately groomed with a latte in hand while I am in trackpants, a sensible rather than glamorous coat and have frequently been rained on.  Last week I ended up covered in grease from doing one of Scott's little jobs.  In the 15 minute break between two games I had to go and drop off the pipes from the Bulldozer to the engineering workshop, hence the grease.  I also had to drop meat off at the butchers and pick up a box of sausages and check in at the motorbike shop to see if the quad was ready. 

Next year is going to be a little harder.  Although Jimmy started playing rugby this year, being 4 his enthusiasm has waned a little (or at least Scott's has) so we have taken a casual approach and only taken him along occasionally.  Next year will be different though and I am sure Scott will be approached for coaching duties.  I have admit that I am pleased that at this point our children are not in representative teams as that makes life even more difficult with two practices in town each week (3 hour round trip) on top of practices for their local team, then tournaments all around the lower North Island on Sundays.  It's just what you do for your kids though isn't it, although in my opinion rural people have to make a much larger commitment, including financially.  Roll on Summer I say when I can have my Saturday's back.

DAGGER IN CHIEF?!

I won't start by making excuses for not blogging.  Anyone who knows us knows how many people come through the station and how many people I have to feed.  At present I am feeding the six of us (and Scotty of course eats for two), two young Frenchmen (ou la la), a young South African and a couple from Cornwall in the UK, hence the lack of time.  I am also coaching a netball team, have been writing policies for the local Early Childhood Centre and Bus Committee and attending meetings for both.  Not to mention all the unpaid volunteer work I do for the station and of course raising the four holy terrors.  Actually now that I think about it, those all sound like excuses, but they are very plausible ones.

So today it was time for some dagging.  We have the students from Taratahi Agricultural Training Centre out here at the moment with their tutor, plus the aforementioned foreigners and of course ME, general dogsbody.  The plan was to get the foreigners dragging the sheep from the pens for the students who would then dag.  I had a wee giggle to myself because when we went up there all us Kiwis stripped off a couple of layers of clothing and put on some mocs.  After about ten minutes and a hell of a lot of sweating, the french boys started stripping off their layers as well.  Patch, from Cornwall, has done a wee bit of time on a handpiece before so he was able to actually get on the end of one and give it a go.  I always think that any muppet can work with sheep and there is no skill involved.  Today disproved that theory, there is definitely an art to working with them. 

I decided I would put my broom down for a bit and drag for a couple of the girls who were dagging.  I went into the pen beside one of the french boys and it became apparent to me immediately as to why they were sweating so much.  Now bear in mind that I am somewhere north of 30, have spat four kids out and I'm probably old enough to be the boys' mother (had I been overly amorous as a teenager) so you would think that they would have it all over me on the fitness front and would find flipping a sheep much easier than me.  Alas, no.  Turns out that my years spent in docking pens and yards as Scott's apprentice has served me well.  I was able to flip a sheep much quicker and easier than the boys and was able to "advise" them on the correct technique.  This was also the case when it came to them having a go on the handpiece.

The french boys are studying agriculture in France and one of their course requirements is to spend four months completing an internship on a farm in an english speaking country.  Of course given that they are on a large sheep and beef station, it was only a matter of time before they were given a handpiece and taught to dag.  Again, its that same old thing of knowing how to handle a sheep.  The boys found it really difficult to get the sheep to relax and looked incredibly awkward trying to hold them.  At that point I felt I really wasn't in a position to criticise (at least not out loud) and it's a long time since I've been on the end of a handpiece.  I did make some smart comments about them not knowing how to get a woman to relax but I think that perhaps it got lost in translation, or they just chose to ignore me.

Catherine being taught how to shear by Scott with Mathieu watching on.

Patch from Cornwall being handed a sheep by Mathieu from France

What a team, husband and wife doing the business.

So we were getting towards the end of the day and I decided that I would give it a go.  I have picked up a handpiece before but it was a hell of a long time ago.  There is definitely a huge advantage in knowing how to hold a sheep and getting it to sit in a relaxed position.  To be honest, I surprised myself, and I definitely surprised my darling husband, with my skills.  For everyone else who gave it a go, they had to keep stopping, turning the machine off, repositioning and starting again.  NOT ME.  I was able to dag without too much difficulty, just had a wee bit of trouble getting around the hamstring area, but Scott assured me that was more to do with blunt gear than my actual technique.  Four sheep done and dusted in double quick time (or at least quicker than the frenchies, Marius from South Africa and Catherine from Cornwall and no slower than the Taratahi female students).  The young guys all only shore one each.  I was blardy proud of myself given my age and overall physical condition.  My only concern now is that because I made not a bad fist of it, Scott is going to make me practice a little bit more and then use me as his dagger-in-chief?!  Shit, I hope not.  Of course when he finally arrived back at the house tonight I told him how wonderfully well I had done and that he should be proud of me.  As is usual for Scott he completely burst my bubble by giving me a withering look and saying "Yes Dear but you only did four, let's see how good you are when you do a full day".  I think he just issued a challenge.  It's yet another skillI I can add to my ever-growing resume as a Farmer's Wife.

Here I am, giving everyone a demonstation

BUSY?!

I was intending to try and blog twice a week, but its been a little hectic since my last post.  Hectic  is good though, I love to be busy.  I have worked it out that from Friday to Sunday night I fed something like 120 people through my kitchen...I hadn't actually thought about it until now and will sit down later and work the actual figure out.

So last Friday we had a phone call at 3.30 from some friends who wanted to come diving.  I had a bit of a giggle because the bloke is very "to the point" and when he phoned he just said "yeah, we're gonna come for a dive, that's cool aye.  Don't know what the girls are doing, some shit.  We'll see you later".  I was left knowing that some blokes were coming, but not how many and that maybe some girls and kids would come too, but not who or how many!! What really pleased me was that they felt they could do that...just ring up randomly and come on out.  So about 5.00 two ladies and some kids walk in the door with wine...love it.  The men and some of the other kids had gone down for a dive.  We proceeded to have a great evening.  Friends that can just rock on up and who don't care what you look like or what your house looks like are the best kind!!!  Unfortunately, I drank a little too much wine which did not show good foresight given that I had to host Lizzie's 8th birthday party the next day and had five extra little girls.  Its not like you can just shoot out to the supermarket or store where we live so we managed to scratch up some tucker for the 9 kids and 8 adults...it wasn't gourmet (sausages in bread and hot chips with paua for the adults) but it filled a gap.

In amongst the birthday party mayhem, on Saturday, Ian and Carolina from Chile were still with us and our three pig hunting mates (interlopers) were back as well.  I also had to think about the food for Sunday when we were having a pre-christmas family get together.  Managed to get the ham glazed on Saturday and everything else done ready for Sunday after feeding 11 for dinner and a similar amount at lunchti.me! Sunday lunch was 23 people.  I had fortunately had the foresight to decide on using paper plates so that we would have more time to go to the beach rather than washing up.  Had a brilliant day and really enjoyed spending time with the whanau.  I had made life easier for myself by deciding we would do "gourmet sandwiches" and I had cooked a beef fillet and ham leg and made two massive lettuce salads.  I got Mum to pick up fresh bread rolls and french bread sticks.  Fortunately my Uncle's wife is Chinese and so she brought some beautiful chinese pork buns, peking duck and butter chicken (which I realise is Indian).  Scott's Mum also brought some home made savoury pies and delicious slice.  Aunty Ro brought cake and nibbles.  What a feast!!!

Monday morning and it was time for Ian and Carolina to depart.  We had organised for them to go and stay with Scott's parents for a few days at Makaretu.  The first of our two german couples was supposed to turn up at lunchtime.  Of course, they got lost and arrived at 4pm!!  We had another german couple scheduled to arrive Wednesday, but of course they too got lost and as they were hitch hiking we had to go and pick them up from the side of the road in the middle of nowhere at 9.00pm on Tuesday!  In amongst all the comings and goings I've been flat out cooking for everyone, writing policies for the Pongaroa Community Buses, cleaning, washing, etc etc.  It has been very helpful having helpx exchange people here though to give me a hand.  Yesterday Markus took the chainsaw and sorted out a whole lot of shrubs in the garden while Jossi, Oggi and Sarah sugarsoaped the back corridor ready for painting.  They also went and helped Scott shift a mob of sheep.  This gave me some free time to mow the paddocks around the house on the little blue tractor.  I am a little bit obsessive and don't like the house paddocks looking untidy so I decided I would top them (mow) to get rid of the thistles.  We have a tiny little tractor that is used for mowing the olive groves which I thought would be perfect.  I did discover a little tip while I was mowing.  If you are overly endowed in the chest department and you are mowing on a tractor, you really should wear two bras.  I had to come inside and put a second one on to try and mitigate the movement.  You will be pleased to know I did not take a photo to share!!  So all in all its been really busy this week.  I have had to attend a couple of meetings, Scott's hardly been here at all and we are trying to shearing started.  I have already this morning cleaned the house, folded all the washing and made some scones. 

On the cooking front I did say I would share some of my large quantity recipes.  I have a cake one that is fantastic and isn't too fattening as it is made with oil.  You can use the mix to make two cakes, one oven dish sized cake, a zillion muffins or cake and muffins.  I am going to make cake and muffins later today and will freeze the muffins for next week when I have to "take a plate".

Here's the recipe:

2 cups Chelsea caster sugar
3 cups self-raising flour
2 teaspoons baking soda
½ cup cocoa

3 eggs, separated

2 cups milk
2 tablespoons malt vinegar
2 tablespoons Chelsea golden syrup
2 teaspoons vanilla
1 ½ cups cooking oil
1 egg

Preheat oven to 180 celsius.  Separate the three eggs.  In one bowl beat the yolks, milk, vinegar, golden syrup, vanilla, oil and extra egg.  Add sifted dry ingredients and beat again.  In a separate bowl beat the egg whites until stiff.  Fold egg whites through the cake mix.  Put into prepared tins (oven dish, cake tins, muffin trays whatever) and bake for about 30 minutes.  The baking time will of course depend on your dish, muffins will take heaps less time, oven dish may take more.  Use your brain.  when I did it I didn't use SR flour, I used ordinary flour and baking powder and I didn't use caster sugar as I never have it, I just used ordinary.  It does come out better if you use one large baking tin and the rest for muffins rather than the oven dish.  I did the oven dish one for Lizzie's birthday and it was fine.  I think I reduced the oven temp too.  

Hope you all have a great week.  I am off to the school talent quest this afternoon where Madeleine is singing an acapella version of Adele's Rolling in the Deep...she's none to shabby so it will be great to watch.  I am really proud of her for getting up and doing it on her own, all her idea!!  Can't think where she gets her confidence from?!

PEE IN A CUP

So I thought I'd give you an insight into having HelpX helpers come and stay.  Ian and Carolina are our first helpers, and we are their first hosts.  Given that we live in the middle of nowhere, I told them I would meet them in Dannevirke and they could follow me out to the station.  Of course the evening they decided to arrive there was a gale force wind warning in place for Hawkes Bay/Wairarapa.  These poor Chileans were forced to drive out from Dannevirke through howling gales of 130 km/h with tree branches all across the road.  Between Weber and Pongaroa it looked like a tornado had passed by.  Of course given that we live in the middle of nowhere, I always use a trip to town to get lots of things done.  On this occasion I decided I would pick up a new farm dog for Scott while I was out.  The poor thing was on the back of the truck in the gale force winds.  I am sure Ian and Carolina thought I was cruel and heartless having him up there.  In the end, when it started to rain as well and the rain was driving in sideways, I decided I would stop and put the dog in the cab.  Again, given that I had used the opportunity of going to town to do other jobs, I had the three girls and a whole lot of groceries and farm supplies in the truck, along with school bags, swimming gear etc.  Madeleine was sitting in the front and ended up with this great big hairy smelly farm dog sitting on her knee.  It did cross my mind at this point to wonder what on earth the Chileans might be thinking and if they could hear the sound of duelling banjos as loudly as I could (if you have seen the movie Deliverance you will understand) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uzae_SqbmDE&noredirect=1.

Of course the wind created other problems.  I told the kids that they needed to use the toilet before we left town because there is nowhere to stop and I would not be stopping on the way home.  Halfway between Dannevirke and Weber Lizzie decided she needed to wee.  I asked her if she could hold on until Pongaroa, to which I got a very terse "NO, I WILL PEE MY PANTS".  Of course I am driving at 100km/h at this point (or thereabouts), have a dog on the back, the Chileans following me and there are bits of tree branch swirling around outside.  Thank goodness for McDonalds and my quick thinking.  I set Lizzie the challenge of peeing into an empty McDonald's drink cup in the back of the truck without taking her seatbelt off...thinking that she might then decide she could hold on.  Lizzie is always up for a challenge.  I handed her the cup, proceeded to drive normally while she peed in the cup.  She did really well, didn't spill a drop and showed an amazing level of dexterity.  She would not be pleased with me for telling this story and banned me from telling anyone including Scott.  However it is too funny not to share.  This left the problem of what to do with urine in a cup?  Why, you put it in the cup holder of course! 

So we finally arrive at the station where Carolina proceeds to ask "Where is the farm?".  We have teased her about it ever since.  Farming in NZ is quite different to farming in Chile.  Ian and Carolina have fitted in so well with our family unit, although it has been a bit of baptism of fire for them.  Scott got them up at 5.30am on their first morning to go for a pig hunt which I will share in the next instalment.

Perhaps the salient point that should be taken away from this blog episode is never ever EVER travel in a vehicle with me or you may find yourself with a dog on your lap and having to pee in a cup.

RETURN FROM THE WILDERNESS

So it's official...I'M BACK.  After a brief hiatus, I have decided that I will reinstate the blog.  There are a couple of reasons for this.  First, the children have now returned to school and are no longer on Correspondence which has given me a whole lot more time than I had before.  The second reason is that we have now moved into a new farming position with lots of interesting things to blog about.

I suppose I should bring everyone up to speed with the journey so far.  Having finally left Ruatoria (phew) we have returned to Southern Hawkes Bay/Northern Wairarapa to manage Owahanga Station.  To give you an idea Owahanga is situated on the Coast near Pongaroa, sandwiched between Akitio and Mataikona beaches.  It is 7200 hectares of coastal paradise owned by a Maori Incorporation, Aohanga.  We are farming sheep and cattle with around 19000 stock units.  There is 3000 hectares of bush and scrub land which holds wild pigs, deer and far too many feral goats.  It has 14 kms of private coastline, not accessible to the public.  It has two rivers, the Owahanga and Mataikona, which form the northern and Southern Boundaries respectively.  I am sure some of you will google earth it.

The three girls are all attending Pongaroa School with Jimmy attending Pongaroa Early Years, which is the local kindergarten.  It is 29 kilometres or thereabouts into Pongaroa but we are EXTREMELY fortunate to have the school bus pick them all up (including Jimmy) right at the gate.  I will share more on the school bus in a later blog.

The other interesting aspect to our lives at present, which will provide plenty of blog material, is that we have started hosting foreign tourists through a site called HelpX.  Basically the tourists come and stay with us for a period of time.  We provide meals and accommodation in exchange for work.  Our first helpers have been Ian and Carolina from Chile who we have absolutely loved getting to know.  They are newly married and have finished their university education and have come to NZ on a working holiday to improve their English.  We have learnt so much about Chile that we did not know (I had to do a wikipedia search before they arrived so as not to look like a moron) and have been able to introduce them to farming, pig hunting, fish and chips and scone making.  As I type they are outside water blasting the outside of the house and laughing alot. Jimmy is "helping" them.  I have plenty more to say on the subject of helpx helpers...again best for another blog....I do not have time today!!  Ian and Carolina are leaving on Monday and Markus and Sarah from Germany are arriving.  We also have Jossi and Oggi from Germany arriving next week as well.  I am setting myself up for a highly paid job in the Hague with all my international relations experience!

Speaking of time (or lack of it), I was thinking this morning about the life of farmers and their wives.  To give you an idea Scott got up at 4.00am and was gone by 4.30am.  The shepherd that lives at the far end of the station, 14kms away, needed to leave his house at 3.30am to get to the yards at the right time.  I hate to think what time our stock agent Crashy had to leave his house at Wanstead to get here before 5.00am!!  I was up at 5.00am making scones for everyone.  I then had to do a rubbish run with all the rubbish, shift some furniture from one of the station houses to another, run several messages up to Scott in the yards, reply to emails for him, answer his telephone calls, feed and sort out a puppy, deal with the dog we have in isolation, start mount washing, change sheets, set Ian and Carolina alight with the water blaster.  That is all only part of it.  I find it is best not to sit down too much or think about all you have to do or you will never get anything done.  I will blog again tomorrow with some material about our helpers, and a bit of pig hunting.  For now, I need to go and put out another load of washing while it is still fine.

Welcome back to my blog about our crazy life....stay tuned!!!!!

IT'S RUGBY, BUT NOT AS WE KNOW IT

I’ve been out of action since my last blog and feeling a bit under the weather.  However, life still goes on regardless.

I was accosted in the local four square last week and asked to be the treasurer of one of the local rugby clubs.  I said I would think about it, hoping that the whole thing might go away and that they would find some other volunteer (sucker) to take on the job.  I was also reminded that our kids are all doing rugby and as such what were we going to do to help.  Would Scott possibly coach the older kids while I helped out with the Rippers?  I said that was fine and went home to inform Scott of our new tasks.  From this a conversation ensued regarding our commitment to Ruatoria C.I.T.Y. wherein Scott suggested that perhaps given we were going to be so involved there with the kids, maybe he could return to the playing field.  Reluctantly, I agreed that it wasn’t the worst idea I had ever heard.  Scott’s reasoning was that he wanted Jimmy to “see his old man play”.  I think he thought that Jimmy, at the age of three, would be incredibly interested and inspired by the sight of his Dad out on the rugby paddock when, in actual fact, he is more interested in how to score a sausage from the sausage sizzle and playing bullrush with the other pre-schoolers.

We visited Gisborne on Thursday and on our way back we decided that if Scott was going to play, he’d better register as a player.  We rolled on up to Whakarua Park at 6.00pm to find about five young fellas sifting around waiting for practice, along with the coach.  Scott of course was welcomed with open arms and after registering dropped the rest of the whanau home before returning to Ruatoria for rugby practice at 6.30pm.  Apparently there were only 10 people at rugby training and there was some concern that they may not have enough players on the day.  However, Ruatoria being what it is, enough people rolled up on the Saturday to just cover a playing 15 and not alot more than that.  Scott arrived home after practice to inform me that I needed to take a plate on Saturday.  Now, taking a plate in Ruatoria is not the same as “taking a plate” anywhere else.  While in other districts I might have got away with a small plate of sausage rolls or club sandwiches, that wasn’t going to suffice up here.  Cue a huge stock pot and a massive wild pork stew, enough to feed 70 odd people.  I thought I’d done a pretty good job for a pakeha.  Scott spent Friday night in preparation mode with Madeleine required to massage tendinitis cream into Scott’s tendons while he sat and watched Super 15 and reminisced on his prowess of days gone by.

Saturday dawns and rugby preparations start early.  I was required to cut Scott’s hair, which I am sure was going to add nothing to his performance, but I duly attended to.  Jimmy of course wanted the same hair cut.  Scott was due down at the Clubrooms at 1.30 with kick off scheduled for 2.30 ish (I say “ish” because on the Coast things happen at “ish” time).  I did a head count of players and discovered there were only 14.  Never mind, I was sure there would be some latecomers.  While Scott was in full pre-match practice mode I was dispatched to the kitchen to help the ladies with the food.  This entailed cutting up veges and meat and getting the boil up on the go.  Its a long way from rugby clubrooms of day's gone by where I only had to rock up with a small plate of something that looked pretty and was merely a snack, rather than a meal.  CITY fed about 200 people post match.

I did notice that instead of the usual black and yellow strip our boys were wearing black and red.  I wondered if it was perhaps something to do with Christchurch or perhaps they always wear an alternative strip for a local derby.  Later on I was informed that the reason they were wearing old red and black jerseys was because last year’s coach had given away the strip to ensure players turned up for the final game of the season....ONLY ON THE COAST!  The club is now trying to raise funds and get grants to purchase a new number one strip.  You will also notice from the photos that Scott is wearing number 1.  Although he is twice the man he once was, with half the speed, he has not had a positional swap to Prop.  It is merely that there are not enough jerseys in the right sizes and numbers to go around.  He was in fact blind side, usually number 6.

The game gets underway with a small huddle by each team.  CITY didn’t do much of a “chant” and was distinctly underwhelming.  Hikurangi, the opposing team, were far more vocal and impressive in their huddle.  This caused much mirth amongst the CITY supporters. and caused them all to shout  "Kia Kaha City" as if somehow they needed to keep their chins up after being beaten in the chanting.   I was intrigued to notice that the referee was female and there are of course no touch judges or anything so sophisticated as that.  Merely the chap from the four square who dishes out the petrol running along the sideline in his four square uniform with a flag.  Dunno who serves the petrol while he has absconded to Whakarua park.  You can see from the photos that there was a slight lack of professionalism in the turn out of the team.  There was an ecletic mix of shorts including long flouresent boardies, and a mixture of socks including one guy wearing black business socks.  There was also a mixture of ages, with one our players nudging sixty.  He filled in as touch judge and went on only in the last five minutes.  There was plenty of jokes on the side line about the “old koroua” we had warming the bench.  Hikurangi also had its fair share of koroua’s as well though.  They did however have a former Hawkes Bay rep in Motu Ngarimu playing for them at lock.  CITY could boast no such representative players.

Of course the game got underway and CITY got a pasting.  You can see from the photos that the half time score was 48 nil.  The final score was 91 nil.  CITY celebrated like they had won because Hikurangi (the Maunga) hadn’t managed to put on a ton.  I didn’t see the last ten minutes of the game as I had to return to the Clubrooms with the children to help with the food.  Now if there’s one thing they do well on the coast, its food.  There were eight large stockpots full of stew or boil up and large pots of veges.  There was also smoked eel, mussels, fry bread, chicken, roast pork, sausages...you name it, it was there.  The Maunga turned up and the speeches began.  Its quite imposing being in a room full of about 200 people and being the only pakehas.  Never mind, its something we’ve got used to now.  We can even follow quite a bit of the Te Reo Maori in the speeches.  I was really impressed when Hikurangi had finished their speeches they got their guitar out and sung a waiata., complete with actions.  CITY on the other hand, did not.  When our chap finished his speech instead of doing a waiata, which is protocol at all Maori events after speeches, he got out a little music box, opened it and it played “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer”.  I must say I felt a little cheated.   I guess that given their pre-match huddle shout, I should have lowered my expectations on the waiata front. Scott was runner up for player of the day...although god knows how.  He injured himself in the first five minutes but went on to play a full game.  His hip is bruised really badly but other than that, he’s in pretty good nick and congratulating himself on the fact that apart from the fact that he can’t walk, he’s in pretty good nick!

Kids had a great time at the rugby as per usual.  Jimmy decided midway through the first half that instead of going around the field, he would run right across the middle of it.  I yelled out to him “no Jimmy, don’t run across the field” hoping he would turn around and run back to where he came from, which incidentally was the sausage sizzle.  Instead he kept on running then slowed down and replied “Oh, I’ll walk” from the middle of the field.  I then had to yell at him “No Jim, keep running”. and run onto the field myself to urge him on.  He managed to get out of the way but it could have ended in a shambles.  The girls ended up playing bull rush against the Coastie kids.  It was the three Somerville girls against all the local Ngatis.  It looked so funny...our three all in a huddle talking team tactics and then being rushed by the Ngatis.  To their credit, the girls held their own and managed a credible performance.  Jimmy was, as I predicted, rather underwhelmed by the fact that Dad was out on the paddock.  He was more interested in eating sausages and running around with the locals.  Perhaps he will be inspired by Dad’s performance next week, although as they are playing Uawa (Tolaga Bay) I suspect there will be a repeat of this week’s scoreline.  I’d better get my thinking cap on for what to make for next week’s “plate”.

The imposinf forward pack.  Numbers mean nothing..anyone who knows anything about rugby knows you don't find no 11 in the forwards!

Getting ready to psych the oposition out.

And so it begins.  I think this may have been the only time CITY was in the opposition's half.

Facing up after one of Hiku's many tries.

The huge crowd, standing room only.

Business socks for "doing the business"

Odd socks on the guy with the strapped hand, check out the shorts on the number 8.

Female ref, who Scott said "did a bloody good job really"

The half time team talk, number 6 is our old koroua adding his wisdom

The half time score.  The time clock never changed.

I left at this point. Note the clock still hasn't changed.

Local Ngati under 5's getting in a game of bull rush.

Anyone need a nose job?

It's been another busy week here on the Coast.

Scott had his mate Jamie and another guy called Spud over from Opotiki for a hunt last weekend. They got six good eating pigs and slayed quite a few smaller ones as well. Scott is pretty happy about the slaying as he has lost quite a few lambs in the last couple of seasons to marauding pigs. He is going to have a big clean up of pigs just before lambing and get a couple of teams of guys and dogs out getting rid of them from the worst affected paddocks. Applications will be accepted from now on by any interested parties! I did laugh though. Scotty isn't the most organised of blokes and so just before they were all about to go out for the first hunt Scott said to me "Dear, have you seen my sticking knife"...I thought to myself "How many wives get that sort of a question thrown at them and know the answer".

Of course every time someone comes to visit there is a tale to tell, and perhaps I should issue a word of advice to anyone planning a pig hunt over here in the near future...mind your dogs around Scott! Spud had brought one of his young dogs over who I thought was a rather nice looking dog, as pig hunting dogs go. He is part Airedale so is red and hairy and I thought kind of handsome. Spud, I am sure, thought I was on another planet commenting on the looks of his dog when really all that is important in a hunting dog is its actual ability. Anyway, the three blokes and all their dogs set off for a hunt on the Saturday evening. They arrived back some hours later pretty pleased with their efforts but giving each other a bit of shit (as you do). Apparently the dog in question has a few "issues" and is a bit of an animal on the pigs (strange phrase to use, I know) and doesn't quit even when all the other dogs have been called off and you're going in to stick to the pig. Scott went in to stick one particular pig and being the rough bugger that he is he ended up cutting a large hunk out of the poor old dog's nose. Spud came home and I was made to look at the poor old dog's nose with Spud lamenting the damage Scott had done to his dog's good looks. It probably isn't good hunting etiquette to cut the other bloke's dog methinks. I am sure Spud will get Scott back one way or another. Should any of you need a nose job done, you will now know where to come to.

Another of Spud's dogs seems to have some issues surrounding the rear end of the pig and is what is known in the trade as a "nut grabber". This dog doesn't only grab the nuts though, apparently he unzips the "purse" with his teeth and then once that job's done goes in and grabs the penis. Gross. However, on reflection, the poor old dog is perhaps wasted on pigs and could be put to better use by the Justice Department giving certain criminals the same treatment. What a genius idea! There was some good news with the dogs. Scott had been given a Collie cross to try on the sheep and cattle. Patch is a really nice natured dog but no good for stock work. Scott had kept him because he thought the dog had quite a nice nature and wasn't sure exactly what to do with him. That problem has now been solved with Patch becoming a pig dog. Scott took him out with Jamie and Spud's dogs and apparently Patch pulled up a pig on his own, more or less. He also spooked a deer which was not ideal but as he's in training it's a win some lose some situation. Scott thrilled to bits and Patches of course now has a reason for existing! I am only hoping that Scott doesn't suddenly decide that he needs more dogs and more equipment. Pig hunting, for those of you that don't know, is now high-tech with the use of GPS collars on the dogs. Of course there is all manner of other assorted paraphernalia for the hunting man to invest (waste) his money on...rip collars, full body protectors for dogs, motorbikes, clothing, spotlights, knives etc. All that money would buy a lot of pork some would say, but of course buying your meat at the supermarket doesn't get the bloke out of your hair for the entire day. There is also the "what you spend, I spend" principle and the "time out you have, is the time out I have" principle...as Charlie Sheen would say its bi-winning!

Jamie left his knife behind and so sent a text to Scott saying could Scott go and retrieve his knife from down the shed. Scott said he'd post it back but Jamie said not to worry about it as apparently Tim (another mate) is coming over shortly for a pig hunt and he will pick it up. Tim is yet to advise us of this, but I am expecting a call any day now. Scott's brother Andy is over from Tauranga this weekend for a deer hunt and there at least two other lots of blokes wanting to come and do the same in the next month...it is of course, the roar. Bring it on...the more the merrier. The payback for me, apart from having a full freezer and some decent company for a change, will be that I get to go away at the beginning of May for a holiday. The Correspondence School are having a camp at Silverstream in the Hutt Valley for five days so I am going to take the kids to it. It's a ten hour (at least) journey one way, but will be worth it I think. Plenty of activities planned the kids, including Jimmy. I won't have to cook, which is a holiday in itself, and we will be able to go and meet all their teachers at the Correspondence School head office in Wellington. Scott, of course, is not coming so I will be undertaking the mammoth ten hour trip with the four kids on my own. Fortunately I am made of stern stuff so I will just have to get on with it. Hopefully I will manage to catch up with a few relatives in the general Wellington vicinity while we are down there and perhaps a spot of shopping?!

Next week is shaping up as a busy one too. After a full weekend with Andy, Sarah and the kids I will need to get myself organised and house cleaned to within an inch of its life for the Board Meeting being held here on Thursday. Of course the event itself will be fully catered by a professional (me). I also have the Correspondence School itinerant teacher visiting on Wednesday, swimming lessons in Gisborne, rugby practice with the kids and goodness knows only what else. Scott's cousin William turned up this morning with a bucket full of kumara and suggested that perhaps he would bring me all the produce in the garden to make some chutneys and relish later today. He got a short sharp shift and was told that perhaps, towards the end of next week, there will be a small window which I can fit making chutney into. What is that they say? If you want something done ask a busy person.

On a final note, I'd like to send a shout out to the Ruatoria Kai Kart. Went there tonight for a feed of fish and chips as I am unwell and couldn't be bothered cooking. I was really impressed. A little old chap tottered up on his two walking sticks. Obviously local, and obviously a regular customer. He said "I'll not have my usual, I feel like a change. I'll have fish, 2 sausages and some chips". A long discussion ensued about what quantity "some" represented. The lady in the Kai Kart told the little old Kaumatua to tottle on back to his vehicle, which incidentally was parked outside the pub, and she would bring his fish and chips over to him. I thought that was pretty neat given that she was the only one working in the Kai Kart and would have to leave it unattended to deliver his meal. As they would say up here "too much youse fullas at the Kai Kart. Ka pai".